Tag Archives: friends

The Bad Thing About “Following Your Dream”

Whenever I hear someone say they’re trying to live their dream, I wonder, how many people out there have truly reached the point where they can fully pursue their interests?

I know I haven’t fully embraced my passions but over the last two years I’ve certainly gotten better. In two weeks I plan to take the second step towards pursuing “my dream”. The first step I took was this April when I took my 10 day road trip that drove me through Jacksonville, FL.

The second part of this pursuit will take place when I take my second trip there. I plan on leaving in two weeks. The trip will involve a drive from Michigan down to Nashville, TN, then a 2 day visit to Jacksonville, FL. On the way back up I plan on hitting Forsyth Park, Savanna, GA..

The question you might be asking is, why Jacksonville? That’s a very good question. It has more to do with my future than it does with my present. Currently I’m in college. I work nearby and have friends nearby. However somewhere down the road – maybe in 3 years or 10 years – I will move somewhere better.

It’s been a big thing for me to truly feel that the place I’m living in is right for me. I don’t feel most of Michigan is. For starters I like warmer weather. On top of that I’m looking for a city with more social and economic activity – unlike most of Michigan.

Explaining this often takes up a great deal of time. People will criticize my interests and goals. The dream I have certainly isn’t a common one. What should I do then?

What do you think, should I share “my dream” with the world or keep it inside my head?

Do you have a dream that most people around you think is stupid or weird? Feel free to jump into the comments below…

3 Things Wealthy People Tell Themselves

There are a lot of things that define success. Some value family, others experiences, still others put popularity and fame above everything else. But here in the U.S.(and I’m sure other countries) people emphasize wealth in the tier of importance.

When it comes to making wealth, building wealth and keeping wealth, there are certain activities and habits that set certain people apart from others. One of the biggest habits is internal dialogue. What we tell ourselves, and thus act upon, is the biggest factor that determines where we end up in life.

If you keep telling yourself that your opinion doesn’t matter or that no one will ever listen to you, this will probably come true for you. If, however, you optimistically believe, deep in your heart, that you deserve to be listened to by others, there’s a good chance more people will listen.

In the same way, what you tell yourself about money will probably, for the most part, become a self-fulfilling prophecy. So be careful. Here are three things that I have seen firsthand from a couple millionaires I have had the pleasure of meeting:

  1. You deserve the opportunity to be wealthy (if you put in the work)

Notice I didn’t say you deserve to be wealthy. This isn’t an entitlement mentality. It’s more of a self-worth manifestation. If you truly believe that you are worth it – you will put in the work. If you don’t think that you deserve a shot at becoming wealthy, you are less likely to put the work that goes into making that happen.

2.  Becoming wealthy isn’t luck, it’s a combination of work, smarts, perseverance, and time

One thing that the millionaires I have met, read from, and learned from have all had in common is a true belief in cause and effect. They never thought luck was something to lean on or be expected. While they did get lucky at certain points, they recognized that the luck was more a consequence of years of hard work, and less a result of blind chance.

3.  I don’t have to be like everyone else.

It’s true. Some people think that being like everyone else is just a given. If people sleep in to 10am, eat crappy food, and watch youtube in their free time, that doesn’t mean you have to. The truth is that most people in the U.S. as well as the world, haven’t made the true commitment to excellence in every area of their lives that millionaires have. You can be different.

These three things are just a start. Not only is it in the realm of possibility to become a millionaire, it is becoming easier than ever. Granted, it isn’t going to be easy.

How I Drove 2,300 Miles Without My License (And Why You Shouldn’t) Part 3

As I left Dallas I realized the trip was almost over. “What’s next?” I thought as I drove up towards Oklahoma City, OK.

Later that night I decided I would be traveling up through Kansas. Sounds like a cool place right? So off I went, driving late into the night. I was ready to explore Wichita and Kansas City as soon as I found a place to stay for the night.

At this point I was in southern Kansas, near Wichita. It was near midnight. Out on the country road it was 65mph but as I entered a little town I didn’t see the sign that said 45…  oops.

Lights flashed behind me. Even though this was my first time being pulled over after four years of driving (I’m not a bad driver btw) I couldn’t help feel a little discouraged. Was it a speed trap?

As the female officer walked up alongside the vehicle I pulled out my registration and reached for my wallet. “Hello,” she said, “I just wanted to let you know you were speeding. Not by too much, though. Can I see your license and registration?”

I handed her the registration. Opening my wallet I fumbled as I opened up where the license normally is supposed to be. I pulled out the enhanced license slip that holds the license. Opening up, I looked inside… my license was gone.

“Umm,” I awkwardly said, still looking through my wallet to see if it was somewhere else. “I can’t find my license.”

“Ok,” she said, “Can I see maybe student ID or something with a picture on it while you keep looking?” “Sure.” I handed her my student ID.

I continued to look as she went to her car. A few minutes later another police car showed up. This time a man stepped out. He and the woman walked up alongside the car. “Did you find it?”

“No luck I said,” glancing up. I got out of the car and started looking in the back. “Where is it?” I thought. I was so confused as to where it could have gone. I continued to look. “Here, can you use this?” The man officer held out a flashlight. “Thanks,” I said, realizing I also had a flashlight somewhere in the car.

After a little while they told me to pull up a few hundred yards to a little gas station. Shortly after parking they asked me to put the car keys in the car and get out. “Look,” the man said, “from our perspective this whole situation is bizarre. It looks like you’re telling the truth, but it’s taking a lot time for us to look you up in the Michigan Driver’s records.

Finally, fifteen minutes or so later they were able to look me up and get my drivers license number. I wrote it down and we said our goodbyes. The male police officer, George, shared his name and we shook hands. They were very nice and considerate.

Whatever happened that day, I’m very glad for kinder, understanding police officers.

By the way, I did find my license a few days later, but that’s a whole different story. At the end of the day we can take one big lesson a way: Even if you think your license is in your wallet, it never hurts to double check.

How I Drove 2,300 Miles Without My License (And Why You Shouldn’t) Part 2

The Trip Started like most trips begin, the last minute struggle to get everything else together. As soon as the car was packed I headed off towards my first stop on the way to Florida: Nashville. The day went fairly quickly, with a few stops along the way. Around dinner I arrived in Nashville. The busy city stood still in the orange sunset on the horizon. I liked Nashville but it wasn’t my favorite city.

That night I stayed near Nashville. The next day I drove to Jacksonville, FL. On the way I stopped in Atlanta, Georgia. In a Chick Fil A there was a lady who wouldn’t stop talking. She asked me about my day and all of the casual conversation, but she wouldn’t stop talking. I was glad to finally get my food and get out of there.

I arrived in Jacksonville, my first real stop, around dinner time. After exploring a little, I found a Walmart parking lot to stay in and slept peacefully. I explored Jacksonville, including the beach, the following day.  Beach.JPG

The next day I drove to Miami, with a quick stop in Orlando. At Miami I drove the city downtown during the midnight traffic. What a beautiful sight – all those banks and skyscrapers towering above you with lights shinning. It was definitely a worthwhile trip.

I picked a Walmart that allowed overnight parking and started to sleep. Then I heard a knock on the door. “We’re closed now, you’ve got to move.” I heard the voice coming from outside my car. I looked at my phone and realized this was a different location from the one I thought it was. Ooops!

It was 4:30 am. I was so frustrated that I drove from Miami back up to Tampa the next day. I stopped there and went by the beach. But I decided to head back up soon thereafter. I drove all the way up to Tallahassee by the end of the day. But this time I picked the right Walmart.

On the following day I drove though Baton Rouge and took a stop in New Orleans for a stop at the famous Cafe Du Monde. I had a delicious treat and then it was time for bed.

Next I went to Houston the following morning and got stuck in traffic. After sitting a couple hours I explored Houston and thereafter started driving up to San Antonio.

Next was Sunday. I woke up and saw the Alamo – a beautiful reminder of the men who died for everything they held dear. Then I drove an hour or two to Austin. Austin, the Capital of Texas, is a clean, technology-driven city. I liked it but it wasn’t on the same vibe as me.

That night I went to Dallas and tried to take a picture of the skyline. My Dallas Skyline.jpg

The guy next to me, a photographer with a nicer camera, took some pretty awesome shots. I liked Dallas the second most out of all the cities, right behind Jacksonville, FL..

At this point my trip was beginning to look like it had come to a close. Now I was starting to think about heading home…

How I Drove 2,300 Miles Without My License (And Why You Shouldn’t) Part 1

You might be thinking this is clickbait. Or is that a typo? No, I really did drive 2,300 miles, without my license, by myself, at 18 years old across the country. Now before I tell you how I ended up in the middle of Kansas, at midnight, with no license I need to give you some background.

In the summer of 2017 I started thinking about what I wanted to do with my life and what I wanted to become. This was around my 18th birthday in July. As the summer finished and the School year began, I started realizing that I could, if I wanted, take a trip that would give me further knowledge about what was out there.

In December 2017 I decided to follow through. During this time I was working full time as well as doing school full time so there wasn’t a lot of access time for spare planning. But I did manage to put together an incomplete document that would start me on my preparation.

Around Christmas I headed over to Zambia, Africa (I was visiting my family who moved for orphan missions, but more on that in another post). In Zambia I finalized my plans, which were fairly detailed, deciding against the 8,000 mile trip I was originally planning.

My new plan was to head down to Florida, explore, head back up through Louisiana to Texas, explore, and then head home to Michigan. All with a few minor stops along the way. The trip was around the corner. I was so excited!

It was a bittersweet moment for me. My time in Zambia was about over. And, in March 2018, I said goodbye to my family after 3 very special months. This had been a great period to rest, learn, and spend time with the most important people in my world.

I flew back to Lansing by myself, pondering and searching for a single feeling to feel. But there were so many. I felt alone. Even though I was going to live with my Grandma (and what a blessing that is), I was missing the people who had been with me my whole life.

I also felt anxiety. Here I was, 18 years old, with so many life changes like college, work, summer plans, and then my trip, all coming up just around the corner.

But I was also excited. My life had been, for the most part, out of my control up till this moment. And now the pen and paper were finally getting handed to me to write my own story. I thought I was ready.

With these emotions and so many others spreading around in my mind and nervous system, I really was starting to grow up. Not all at once, but slowly.

The plane landed.

I got to Lansing, spent time with friends and Grandma, and after one week it was time to leave. Finally, the moment I had been waiting for had come. Again, I thought I was ready. So, in the first few days of April, I left.

 

The Cost of Not Spending

Often when it comes to money we get the basic financial advice of reducing spending, increasing income, and investing the difference. However there is an extreme that this can be taken to.

Most have heard the tale, “A Christmas Carol”. In it, Ebenezer Scrooge is portrayed as an old single bachelor who has been hoarding his money, keeping to himself, and worrying pretty much only about himself. While we’d like to think we’re exempt from this behavior, it can become difficult at times to see that we’ve started to show some of his characteristics.

For example some people think that it’s a smart life choice to not tip. A guy I used to work with told me he “didn’t do tips because they don’t need it.” I understand decreasing the tip for bad service, but doing so for other reasons is being cheap. Understand, that’s how many of those people make their money.

Another area where people often lack clarity is in the area of giving. Some think, that by giving, they’re somehow benefiting themselves. While it’s certainly true that giving all your money away isn’t a smart life choice for pretty much everyone, there are genuine benefits to honest, purposeful giving.

Giving doesn’t have to be financial either. I was quietly reading in the park once, in downtown Lansing, when a homeless dude walked up to me. We talked for a while, and I feel that the encouragement I gave him, as well as the insights and story he gave me, were a mutually beneficial exchange.

Whatever your philosophy on giving, tipping, and sharing, keep in mind that sometimes there’s a non-financial cost to not giving.

Everything Wrong With Making a Lot of Money

Let’s say you get out of college and are starting your first “real” job. You’re a young doctor so you already start out making more than the average person. Or maybe you’re middle aged and making the most money you’ve ever made in your life. Let’s just say you make a lot of money.

Where does the money go? Well most people who make a lot have a lot of expensive education required to get the job in the first place. That means student loans. If you were disciplined enough or lucky enough that your parents payed for you, then you won’t be in the same boat as most people.

Other wise, though, you’ll have student loans to pay on. That’s expense number one. The second big expense is more of an optional thing but most high-payed professionals usually opt in. It’s called lifestyle extravaganza.

Most doctors, lawyers, or well-payed professionals start seeing the bigger paychecks and begin making larger purchases to live up to what other people expect of them. It’s less of need for comfort than a need to impress and fit in with what people expect of them. “I have more income,” they tell themselves. “Why not?”

While most of us would like to think that these people are banking dough(and a lot of them are), most of the time, that’s simply not the case. People who make a lot of money are just like everyone else, they want to fit in.

The problem is they’re missing a valuable opportunity. Having a high income is not only a great thing for lifestyle, it can become a fabulous thing for your finances. Simply keeping your lifestyle low and investing the difference can make huge differences over 10 year timeframes. Still not convinced?

It might be hard to believe but putting off buying that boat today could mean, 10 years down the road, being able to purchase any home you want. Compound interest is simply that powerful.

Not only does making a lot of money come with disadvantages like the expectation of lavish lifestyle and larger student loan debt, it can also turn into a financial blessing if you manage your money well and stay disciplined. Just because you make double as much money as someone doesn’t mean it’s smart to buy a home double as large.

So if you are in the situation of making good money, be weary of the obstacles that stand in your way to having a better future. Realize what your income could turn into – both good and bad. And for students who think more income equals more net worth, be careful…

Why Students Should Work In College

I can tell you why you’re not working hard enough. There are a lot of people who know how to work intelligently, with both work and life in general. They only engage in activities that are precisely planned and efficiently organized. These are often the well-educated people, those who know the best, smartest use of time. But often they spend a lot of it relaxing or enjoying fun activities.

Then there are the hard workers. They’re the people who do the heavy lifting. They end each day both physically and mentally exhausted. These are the people who work 60+ hours per week, striving for some piece of the American dream.

Lastly, but by far the rarest group of them all is the smart-hard worker. This person is someone who not only engages in thoughtful planning, meaningful self-improvement and learning, but also in the daily “grind”, the discipline-filled early mornings, the continuous extension of energy.

By far the last group can achieve the most. Not only do they have the advantages of planning and efficiency, they also spend enough time working that they can begin to get a better grasp of their tasks and gain a larger force of momentum behind them as they get into the swing of things.

One of the best times to make strides towards this happy medium of efficiency (thoughtfulness, planning) and force (work, discipline) is being a student with a job.

Now before you go off and start dismissing this idea as both impractical and stupid, please take this journey with me through my thought process and how I worked 40 to 50 hours per week while going to school full-time (and still spending a little time with family and getting a 3.8 GPA).

First, why work in school? One of the reasons most students work is to both pay for school, and gain valuable work experience in college. I want to add one more reason: better grades. Better grades? Yeah. According to a cnbc.com article there is a correlation between students who work part-time and those who get better grades. The reason this makes sense is that having a job creates a sense of greater responsibility in your life. You not only have a different perspective, but you also have less time to goof off, which makes it easier to get down to business.

I would recommend most students seriously consider working at least 20 hours per week during the semester. Not only will you most likely get better grades, you can also start to see more money coming in to pay expenses.

My challenge: get a job while you’re in school. You might find that you have more confidence, job experience and money.

Is It Possible to Become a Billionaire?

When most people think of a Billionaire they think of Warren Buffet, Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos, or even Elon Musk. But very few people have heard of Bernard Arnault, Amancio Ortega, or Ma Huateng. These people, not as well known as some of the others, have made their way to the list of top 20 billionaires in recent years.

Bernard Arnault made his money by developing a large company that focuses mostly on luxury items and services. He has a large collection of art and is the richest person in France.

Amancio Ortega built is fortune in fashion. He is the sixth richest person on the globe but likes to keep his personal life private.

Ma Huateng has built his fortune around technology, specifically the internet. He funded Tancent, which is the highest valued company in all of Asia.

Each of these men are relatively unknown by the general U.S. population yet remain powerful, wealthy and esteemed in their area of focus. So the question that comes up is, is it possible to repeat their stories or stories like them?

The answer is yes and no. Each of these people, including the whole Forbes list of billionaires, are remarkably smart, hard working and strategic. Most of them have not only worked hard to get where they are, they have also “sacrificed” basic things that a lot of us feel are regular parts of a typical life like regular free social interaction and time with friends.

For example Elon Must was showering at the YMCA and sleeping in the office at one point.

For for all the self-made billionaires there were times where they were working their butt off. But pretty much everyone has worked their butt off right? True, but these men and women were purposeful about what they worked on, and were smart about being efficient, strategic and passion driven.

So, if it wasn’t necessarily working hard that made these self-made billionaires rich, but a set of internal actions, habits and principles, what does that mean for us? Well first that it’s completely possible, but not likely to reach their level of success in a different area of focus.

Secondly each of these people had some degree of luck, but even with the luck, it’s no surprise that any one of them is where they are today. While each of them had luck they also planted the seeds of success and let the work, perseverance, time and their brains help grow it.

One of the main similarities between all these people is 1) their commitment to improvement, 2) their involvement in business or customer satisfaction, and 3) their intelligent decision making multiplied over many times. If you sprinkle a lot of hard work on the seed you can see how it grew into a large tree. All of these things together equal focus. Being focused on achieving their goals and having a great time doing it seems like a big similarity here too.

So if you’re wondering if there’s a certain industry posed to do the best the answer is probably internet technology or AI or something along those lines. But that’s not the right question to ask. You have to find the one thing that makes you intrigued, and draws you in day after day. If you have a big difficulty even thinking about it each day that’s probably not a good sign.

Bill Gates was into computers. Jeff Bezos was into customer satisfaction and was intrigued and excited for the internet. Elon Must is into science yet balances that intrigue with his drive to make something tangible for the future. It’s not so much the industry you’re in, but the culture you have and surround yourself in of discipline, hard work, passion, improvement, learning, integrity and ultimately intense focus.

Should I Have a Credit Card?

Many people have heard of the Dave Ramsey show. He often speaks of how “cash is king,” debt it dumb, and how everyone should stay out of debt. Dave argues that while some people use the credit score for getting loans, getting jobs, and renting an apartment, there are ways to get around using a credit score.

While this argument is technically true, there are a few difficulties to this. First I want to start by saying that I deeply respect Dave Ramsey and the work he does. The vast majority of his advice I agree with, like getting out of consumer debt, investing for retirement, and budgeting carefully.

However, on this key point I disagree. While not having a credit score at all can certainly work for some people, like those who don’t need many loans, and are willing to work around no credit score, there are times when having a credit score can save a lot of time, hassle and opportunities.

Take buying a home. If you don’t have a credit score you have to either buy a home outright for cash, or you have to go get a loan by doing what’s called manual underwriting. This is when the lender audits you through various lenses and metrics without necessarily looking at your credit score.

They might look at your job history, payment history for rent and other bills, your income, assets and possibly references to gain a picture of whether or not you can pay the mortgage every month. While this can certainly work, it is less streamlined, less predictable, and overall more hassle. That’s fine if your willing to go through the process. But for those who would like a relatively predictable, hassle-free and repeatable loan process this might not be the best option.

Now let’s say you want to forget about credit all together. This is definitely an option. However if you want to get another mortgage, or other debt soon after going through manual underwriting, you may wan to reconsider.

As soon as you get your new loan, it will usually be reported to the credit agencies. After a few months you will probably have a credit score, simply because you now have a loan. Even if you never add more debt to the picture, that mortgage will probably be active on your score for months or years after you get the mortgage.

The bottom line is be aware of having a credit score is something you want to do. For some people who want a simple life with practically no debt this might be a good option. For others who either want to use debt for multiple purchases or start investing in real estate as investments, you might want to reconsider…